Image result for beyond burger biting intoThey take up space, they’re invading, they rape little girls and pimp them out, they are the invading hordes of Muslims in England. With no free speech to protest what to do what to do?

Well we have finally found the solution! Presenting Muslim Burgers!

The secret is out – Muslims taste DELICIOUS! And make a great burger. It’s a lean cut of meat with just a hint of morrocan spices.

“I was skeptical at first, but it was love at first bite, and we don’t seem to have so many muslims around here anymore” said Barth Brightington, a Liverpool dock worker.

“It seems like a win win, I mean, tasty burgers PLUS a newly freed England? I’m eating TWO of them every day!” said Jerome Hasselmack biting into the juicy burger.

“I’m a vegan and against animal cruelty, so that’s why we are so excited with this new vegan option! No animals were harmed in the making of this burger right? Forget Beast Burger and Beyond Burger synthetic meat, this tastes like the real thing” said Rainbow Tush, a local feminist vegan activist.

“Uh don’t tell anyone but we like them too” said a group of bearded muslims. “Yi HYi Yi Yi Yi” said a thing covered in black. We are taking that as a THUMBS UP! WAAAY UP.

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The streets are less crowded and the mosques are converting back to churches. People are coming out holding hands and candles and singing christmas songs at night. It’s beautiful.

While the trial burger has only been available in a few cities, plans are being made to offer them across europe.

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