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“You have stolen my childhood, how dare you, HOW DARE YOU” screamed an uppity child named Gretta Thrunberg.

“This is all wrong…You all come to us young people for hope. How dare you! You have stolen my dreams and my childhood with your empty words.

So the really odd thing about this girl is that I thought she was a ten year old. Maybe 12 years old tops. But apparently she is a very age regressed 16 year old. And rather than a childhood of smoking cigarettes, drinking a beer, and coping a feel under the bleachers, she has apparently been locked in a room with Loops of Al Gore’s climate change videos. Oh the polar bears.

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The problem with the climate change malarky is that… OF COURSE THE CLIMATE CHANGES. It gets colder at night, and warmer in the daytime.  No wait you don’t get it, the whole planet will die in 12 years. Because CO2 is rising. Wait, isn’t CO2 what plants need to grow? No it will raise the temperature by two degrees. Wait, that’s not very much! I mean if it was 100 degrees OK I’d be like whoa, stop this CO2.

But the real biatch of it all is, scientists who put out thermometers and record temperature at places like antartica were caught FAKING THEIR DATA. That’s right, the first alarms about global warming were all based on fake data.

and another thing. We’ve had warming periods before – the younger dryas comes to mind, or that freak year in the 1700s when they were growing grapes in england and making wine. So none of this is up to muster. There just isn’t ever a clear model or a clear prediction that holds out.

“Our CO2 budget will be spent in 8 years” sounds like a new fiat currency at play? Climate Coin? Get in early then PUMPnDUMP.

Someone needs to snatch Gretta away and tell her she’s been brainwashed and that it isn’t science. Maybe give her a solid spanking. Sadly she looks too angry and too far gone.

“We’ll be watching you” says Gretta looking out ominously.

Listen to Greta’s speech below: