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Bankers Lunch

An ongoing series where we listen into secretly taped conversations at a posh Wall Street Restaurant between two bankers:

Banker1: What do you mean it isn’t working
Banker2: I mean it isn’t working. We’ve withdrawn all the money supply, we have been giving bankers interest on their deposits at the fed to stop them lending to small business, and still there’s no protests in America
Banker1: Like in Greece you mean
Banker2: Greece was easy. We OWN Greece.
Banker1: Why don’t you try just giving a few million dollars in zero interest loans to your corporate fatcat friends
Banker2: You don’t think we’ve tried? WE gave out 100 BILLION dollar loans to everyone we could think of. Still no one cares. Its like we can just walk out every day with two garbage bags full of money, put them in our trunk, and people think its business as usual
Banker1: Surely America will wake up at SOME point. I mean you’re devaluing their dollar 20% a year. Gold is skyrocketing. Someone has to notice!
Banker2: Bernake says its all being handled and the Americans believe him. Heck even Europe is starting to believe America has a robust economy. Frankly we are out of ideas. There’s just no way to get this great depression rolling. Sure we’ve grabbed a few million houses but thats chump change. We want europe. We want America, We want it all this time.
Banker1: Well there are stories of belt tightening, few jobs to be had, Obamavilles with tent cities. Surely your policies are working
Banker2: But its not enough to start a world war. We need rioting in the streets to bring in the new Bankist order. Anything less and they won’t let it happen
Banker1: But you got through the bankruptcy reforms?
Banker2: Oh yah I remember that. Talk about needing big bags of cash to bribe off congress! sheez. But this time its different. We’ve told them there will be martial law to get the TARP, there’s really nothing more that we can do people just aren’t getting scared any more. Its like disaster and poverty are the new status quo and people just go on with it.
Banker1: Well we can get china to start de-pegging. that will get inflation through the roof.
Banker2: WE’ve tried that. The government just lies about inflation and pretends everything is ok.
Banker1: And the Sheeple believe it?
Banker2: You’d be surprised. If it weren’t for Ron Paul we’d have the whole Republican primary in the bag. That Bachman is fierce have you seen her? Claims to be a tea party candidate, first thing she does is vote to extend the patriot act, and people still love her!
Banker1: So we are winning!
Banker2: yep. Its just like disks of Tron. We’ll win, its only a matter of time.

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